distinguishing-miles-from-coltrane-section-header TW13

Nightmare Scenario

Sometimes the words come a-spilling:
tripping over themselves as they
empty out of my mouth.
And it is imperative that I
voice them:
else I would choke
and my thoughts, my curses my insecurities all,
they would drown me.

And instead of being something that I would use to
place myself within my experience,
they would remain:
filling in the cavity that is my body.
Leaving me to float through the rest of my time
a bloated, misshapen thing:
a scream silenced,
a retching withheld,
a story untold.
If I did not voice them,
my thoughts, my curses, my insecurities all,
they would drown me.

SO TELL ME: What do you think of this piece?

  • Did it engage you?
  • Does the meaning come across? Are there any images or lines you don’t understand or find unclear?
  • Are there obvious errors in spelling, punctuation or grammar?
  • Do you have any suggestions for revision?

Please be brutally honest in your assessments – good, bad or indifferent.
I don’t scare easily; and I really do want to hear what YOU have to say about my work.

Many thanks in advance for your time and your criticism.

Related Posts


ugly shoes SPREAD THE WORD
If you liked this post, I mean really liked this post, why not tell your friends? You could also subscribe while you’re at it. You know, so you don’t miss anything.

AUTHOR: I am might war. I have a love of music, the written word, travel, Anime, polar bears, people and “sticking and colouring”.

6 thoughts on “Nightmare Scenario

    1. Isn’t it though? But I think I tend to forget the shared purpose of writing, as most of my work never gets beyond the page of the notebook it’s written on. That’s part of the reason for setting up this blog. To share my words with others and get some feedback through their response to it. Thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts.

Then YOU Said...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s