distinguishing-miles-from-coltrane-section-header TW13

Conversations With My Mother – 3: I’ve Got To Look Away From You

You no longer have the right to “release” me –
I release myself.
 
I will not destroy myself for you any longer;
Nor will I allow you to do so.
You lost that right today.
 
I will no longer play maid to the mess you recreate;
No longer drive myself to distraction with worries of you;
No longer build my life around you.
 
I have done my duty by you;
And you no longer have the right
to ask any more of me.
 
And for all the ways you hurt me;
For all the ways you disregard my
thoughts and feelings;
For all the ways you numb me
with your thoughtless acts and comments;
3 words:
Go        Fuck        Yourself!!!!
 
 
 
Dedication: 02/03/2000: To Mum – I threw away your letter, but your words remained imprinted in my thoughts. These are the words I created to dispel them.
 
 

 
 
SO TELL ME: What do you think of this piece?

  • Did it engage you?
  • Does the meaning come across? Are there any images or lines you don’t understand or find unclear?
  • Are there obvious errors in spelling, punctuation or grammar?
  • Do you have any suggestions for revision?

Please be brutally honest in your assessments – good, bad or indifferent.
I don’t scare easily; and I really do want to hear what YOU have to say about my work.

Many thanks in advance for your time and your criticism.
 
 

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AUTHOR: I am might war. I have a love of music, the written word, travel, Anime, polar bears, people and “sticking and colouring”.

9 thoughts on “Conversations With My Mother – 3: I’ve Got To Look Away From You

  1. Interesting. As I initially read this, I took it as a mother’s words to her child. It was only after i read the footnote that I caught the context intended.

    1. I had never considered that interpretation of these words. Thinking about it, I can see why that would work. It would reflect the constant renegotiation for what one needs from an individual versus role standpoint that occurs in the relationship between parent and child.

    1. Dear Touch2Touch, I heartily agree with your advice and the writing of this piece was my means of letting go of the feelings that it expresses – at that time.

      It may help to know that the purpose of this blog is to share my writing and to find out what other people think of it. It contains work I’ve produced over the last twenty years to date and though some of the pieces are intensely personal, I’ve included them in order to discover how people engage with my words. I am happy to report that my relationship with my mother is much improved as we have found a better way to communicate with each other. 🙂

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